Thursday 25 November 2010

10 things I don't understand.

In light of Karys's post with the same title, I thought it would be a good idea to do something similar.

Ok, here goes, in no particular order...

1. Complex Maths.

Well there you go, big surprise. I can't do maths at all very well.When I learn it it doesn't stick in my head for any longer than it takes to do a test on the stuff. None of it makes any sense to me, but granted to those who can do it it is useful for most systems and computers. I tend to think in words and picture,s and numbers just sit on that like a Pint of cider on a pint of ale.


2. People's obsession with the Apprentice

I don't get this show or why people like it. To me it seems like a whole bunch of try hards on TV trying to be better than everyone in a really pompous way. To me, this is not entertainment, it is insufferable. Wade told me that it is a talking point to start conversation. For example, "...Did you see the apprentice last night?", presumably then conversation starts from nothing. Its terrible, but people watch it so they have something to talk about at college. This makes no sense to me, watch something better, then talk.


3. People who drink Lager

I stand my ground on this. Why drink Lager when Ale exists? Lager is tasteless and fizzy, and a very poor excuse for a beer. Ale is where all the happening is at. The problem is, there exists no popular commercial ale in can form at a reasonable price, which leads to the market being entirely saturated with things like Carlsberg. Ale is the way forward, and I am hopefully grinding this into my friends heads by now.


4. "Hooray Henrys"

For those of you that don't know what these are, it is those type of guys that wear nothing but jack wills clothing, they wear some half-arsed beanie hat thing (despite the fact they are not rastafarians) and they continually act pompous while talking about how much money they have. These people frustrate me because they clearly have no value for money and they do their best to make all of us feel inferior at all times.

5. The price of clothes

The price of designer clothes or anything with a label on it really makes me laugh. You all know the saying,  "you are only paying for the brand name" right? Well we all do, which made me so confused as to why people still did things like spend 30 pounds on a t shirt or 70 pounds on jeans. I then realised that society has gone down the pan and these people ARE actually paying just for the brand to look cool. I personally prefer to be myself and wear clothes that look rad and feel comfortable. So begins the birth of a Hooray Henry when you decide to buy anything like this. Everybody knows, especially me, karys, ricky and I guess James, that the best clothes can be found in charity and curiosity shops.

6. Philistinism.

Oh god Philistines are like my one pet peeve. Anybody who claims not to like something or to say something is rubbish without having seen or tried it is a Philistine. For example, "Man, classical music is rubbish"... "have you ever listened to much?" ... "no, but I know it is stupid" There we go, Philistine.
These people are not in touch or even vaguely aware of anything that is not what they like or know. Now I don't mind, in fact I love, people who will say "metal music? I haven't really listened to it, so I couldn't say" Then you can listen with an open mind and although it may not be your bag, you can appreciate its qualities and why the fans like it.
The worst one is "Ugh, Warhammer? NERD" I had that all through childhood. These people don't know what it is, how to paint or game with it, but they are CERTAIN is it lame. Philistines, damn you all. By the way, the below picture is a Statue of Samson slaying a Philistine. Fantastic work.


7. The price of Red bull in comparison to other energy drinks

I mean, whats the deal. £1.20 for a can. You must be joking. I say no more. Other energy drinks are only minutely different in components and yet its another thing like Cola where everyone pays for the label. Its not even like you get to look cool wearing your brand, because you drink it and then its gone.

8. Why I can't grow a beard

I don't understand why I have been cursed with slow development. Me and Ricky have spoken about this a lot, and it sucks. Just the capacity to grow a decent beard gives you an air of masculinity and respect from your peers. And yet it looks like I won't grow one for quite a while. Also, everyone who has this ability doesn't do it and yet hates shaving? I feel this is a no brainer. One up for Alan, thats all I say.

9. Politics and foreign policy

I cannot pretend to pretend I know about politics or how anything to do with government works. I am not a Philestine however as I agree that politics is necessary to make everything work. I just haven't the faintest how. All I know is Boris Johnson is a hilarious man to watch, and he enjoys his ale. Good man, London is in safe hands.


10. Barbecue ribs.

All you need to do for this one is follow this link to a very early post.

barbecue ribs!

------------------------------------

And that is all. Although there are other things, these are what mostly sprang to mind. Enjoy!

2 comments:

  1. I agree with pretty much everything here, and would also like to add that Stephen doesn't have a full beard either, so you're not the only one - and Alan is just the exception!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Haha! Awesome post, and yes I agree, Charity and curiosity shops have the best things!
    Good to see you blogging, as always!

    ReplyDelete